Going into my junior year of college, I wanted to improve some aspects of my life, so I decided to make goals for the year. In doing this, I realized that I have not always prioritized my friendships, and I wanted to change this. I have always said that I value friendship, but sometimes, my actions do not reflect that. Therefore, I made it my goal to wholeheartedly value my friendships, both in my thoughts and actions.
This process required me to put both the work and effort into shifting my mindset. I had to discover and reflect on why I was doing this and what I could do to change it. My whole life, I have longed for genuine friendships, but I realized that maybe I was the problem. I poured my time and energy into all of the wrong things with all of the wrong people, focused on moments that led nowhere. Instead of ending my nights laughing with my friends, I ended them in strangers’ beds. My nights were a repeating cycle of fleeting moments with boys who had no thoughts of a future with me when I wanted them to be an endless adventure of diverse experiences with friends who were always there for me.
The first time that I truly noticed this shift in my mindset was being expressed in my behavior was actually the first home football game, and I went with my friends. At the beginning of the day, I noticed myself falling into my past habits. I actually tried skipping the game and going home with someone I should not have. However, my friend stopped me, and I am so grateful that she did. When I got to my seat at the game, I was overjoyed to see my best friends standing right there, excited to see me.
At that moment, I knew that the way my night would turn out would be so much better than what it would have been, and it was. At the game, I ate hot dogs with my closest friends and chanted cheers with the entire student section. At halftime, I left the game with the friend who saved me earlier in the day to go meet my best friend. She was with some of our guy friends, so we bonded with all of them. For a while, we sat in one of the guy’s rooms. People kept coming in and out, but it was fun to meet new people. After that, we went outside with a few of our guy friends and enjoyed the fresh air.
Eventually, the friend who saved me and I decided it was time to head home. I walked with her to our sorority house. On our walk, we reflected on our night and how much fun we had. When we made it to our sorority house, I went up to her room to talk for a while. Our conversation deepened my relationship with her as well as my understanding of her.
In reflecting on my day, I realized that it was a special, unexpected memory that I cherish. I learned more about a friend who I previously was not that close to, and I grew to appreciate her more from the time we spent together. I honestly would not have it any other way, and I cannot wait for more nights like this!
Since that day, I find myself making more and more decisions that prioritize my friendships. I actively choose to put myself in situations that strengthen these friendships. In doing so, I create memories that I can look back on and smile. I am proud of these moments and my progress.
– Authentically, AB
